Gone With the Wind

I just finished reading Gone With the Wind by Margret Mitchell. It took me quite a long time to get through, but it was a mostly enjoyable experience.

One night, right after I started reading it, I was eating alone and reading at a local restaurant. This is, by the way, one of my favorite things to do. Anyway, I was reading and the manager came up behind me, asked me how my meal was, and then asked me what I was reading. I showed him the book and looked up at him. He was black. I felt embarrassed to be reading a book that portrays such antiquated and unflattering views of blacks. This was strange for me because I can never remember feeling guilty for reading a book. Well, the following conversation revealed that the manager was more amazed that I was reading a classic instead of something from Oprah's book club. So, I got over my feelings of awkardness fairly quickly.

I think that this book was good enough to win the Pulitzer (which it did). The characters are very rich and well flushed out, and the plot is structured very well. I must admit that the attitude the books characters and author have toward black people was quite alarming and disturbing at times. There was even one slur toward Jewish people made by the main character that just blew me away when I read it. However, for anyone who is interested in reading a good novel with historical elements (the details on the Civil War, particularly the fall of Atlanta, are very good) I would recommend it.

Vacation

Matt and I went on a one night get away this past Friday. I have to say that it was well needed and deserved. And, of course, it was well appreciated. We have been having some disciplinary issues with Ella lately and I have gotten a little stressed out.

We went to a nearby golfing and spa resort and got a room for one night. We had in room massages (and my therapist was a former student of mine...such a small world) and then a late dinner. The next morning after waking at the unusually late hour of 7am, we had breakfast in room, and then spent some time soaking in our jacuzzi tub. We checked out around 11am and strolled around a nearby town after having lunch. We came home around 3:30pm and played happily with Ella for a few hours before putting her down for the night.

By the way, thanks to my parents for staying with Ella for the night so that we could get away for awhile.

You guys didn't really think that we left her alone that whole time, did you!

more signs

First of all, let me apologize for not writing in awhile. Ella was sick, then I was sick, and now she is teething and not sleeping a whole lot.

So, if you read Matt's blog you know that her walking has improved to a point where she will walk a few feet from one stationary object to another with no problems. Example, she will walk from the couch to the music table we have in the center of the living room. Still no stopping and balancing, and still no sitting down in a controlled manner. But we are working on both of those.

I have been much more diligent in the sign language department lately, and she almost has 4 new signs. I say "almost" because she either doesn't do the sign consistently, or because she only does it if you help her out a little bit. These new signs are cracker, milk, book, and open.

I also recommend the "Signing Times" videos for anyone who wants to teach their child to sign. I was skeptical as to how much they would really help because just watching someone else do a sign doesn't do anything for Ella. You have to physically make her do a sign multiple times before she comes close to getting it. But the videos are entertaining, and give you lots of time between new signs so that you have time to do the signs hand over hand multiple times before a new one comes up.

more walking updates

She will now walk, going from parent to parent, as far at 17 steps/9 feet.

We have to do this in the hallway of our house because that is the only space long enough.

She will occasionally, and more often than before, let go of a hand early and walk the last few steps to get to an object (usually the keyboard or the couch). She will also, more rarely than the former, let go of something and walk a few steps to get to a person.

She also has better control of her walk. She can slow down, speed up, make small changes in direction, and can correct minor problems with balance. When she gets to a person she no longer falls into them but lightly takes and hand.

the 3 day experiment

One of the many issues surrounding Ella's learning disability is her resistance to making certain changes.

Up until 4 days ago, she was still drinking 3 6oz. bottles of milk a day. She would not consistently drink any large amounts from a sippy cup and that made we wary of trying to "force" her to quit the bottles all together.

So I decided to try an experiment. For 3 days I would only give her fluids in a sippy cup. I would try additional tactics to get her to drink from them, but no bottles. I offered her a sippy of milk at every meal, and numerous times during the day when she requests that I read to her (which is VERY often, she LOVES to be read to), and whenever we went for a walk and she was in the stroller.

I figured that, if she didn't drink enough, that 3 days of minimal calcium intake would not damage her in any way (she does eat plenty of cheese and yogurt so it wasn't like she wouldn't be getting any!) So, if she didn't get with the program by the end of the 3 days, I would just go back to the bottles for awhile and try it again later.

Well, I am happy to say that it worked. I have spent a lot of time with her on my lap, reading books because it takes her longer to drink the same amount from a sippy than it does from a bottle. But it still worked!

And, now I am selling the bottles on craig's list. One first for Ella, one first for Mama!

test or torture?

Today was Ella's hearing test.

Since she still isn't talking, it was decided to get her hearing tested just to make sure that a hearing problem wasn't contributing to her other issues. Ella has a fantastic receptive vocabulary for a non-talking child, so we thought that she probably didn't have any major hearing problems, but it is better to cover all the bases.

So, Ella and I are sitting in a sound proof room and they are pumping different sounds into different areas of the room and then lighting up toys as a reward when she turns her head to look for the noise. She didn't make it very long before she started wailing and squirming around. The more we tried to get in a few more tones/sounds the worse she got.

Now, I have to admit that sitting in a sound proof room is a bit creepy. I think I would have started crying if I was a toddler, too.

Next, we sit in an office (not sound proof) and they use a machine to, what they called, take a picture of her middle ear/ear drum. Of course, this involves putting something into her ears. Not a good idea. I ended up having to "bear hug" my daughter (restrain her by hugging her tightly with her arms pinned up against her sides) while an assistant held her head as still as she could so that the audiologist could hold this wand in her ear for at least 3 seconds. Mind you, they had to test both ears. Ella was screaming bloody murder and I was trying to calm her down by singing "Row, Row, Row Your Boat" in her free ear.

Needless to say, they didn't get enough testing in to pass her with flying colors. So, we have another appointment to go back in 2 weeks. I do believe that we will only have to be in the booth again, and not have to deal with the ear drum picture thingy because they said that that test came out "within normal ranges".

All in all, this was worse than when she got 3 shots in one day at the doctors. So, I say (dripping with sarcasm) that I can't wait to go back!

Really, it wasn't all that stressfull for me. I just felt sorry for Ella. I guess all her crying was easier for me to handle because I knew that I wasn't the cause of it.

Feeling left out, but in a good way

I currently know 5 women who are pregnant. I also know one woman who recently gave birth, and one other woman who is trying very hard to get pregnant.

I have been wondering since my daughter was born if I wanted a second child (before I had her, I had always thought I would have one child and maybe two, but no more than that). Many different issues have been considered: will it be fair to her for her to be an only child, cost, life changes and stress. And, since she is now a "high needs" child, I also wondered if I could give her the attention she needs with another sibling to take care of.

I know that my decision is a personal one and some of you may be wondering why I would write a post about it. I did this to send a message. It IS a personal decision which means that those of you out there who feel the need to voice your opinions about what my family should do need to think before you speak. I don't want to hear about how lonely you were as an only child ( my brother is 7 years older than me so I have a fairly good idea about what it feels like to be an only child) in an attempt to guilt me into having another baby. I also don't need your theories about how it would be better for Ella to have a "normal" brother or sister to motivate her (are you serious!?!)

I would never think of saying to one of my pregnant friends, "what are you thinking, having a second child?" And no one ever does this (not that I have seen) because it is considered normal to have more than one child. Well, I was always happy being the weird girl, the "odd one out", and I must say that I plan to continue doing things my own way.